My goal is to write something every day but today I got nada, zilch, zero, big fat fucking nothing. I am literally sitting here on my second-hand couch staring out the window with a million things flooding my thoughts but unable to lock in on one. I hate this kind of day where I am pissed off at the world and pissed off my coffee has gotten cold. It is just THAT kind of day. (sigh)
I check my emails, read my horoscope, nuke my coffee, throw a load in laundry and now back to my laptop as I watch my tv screensaver bounce around like Atari PONG. What shall I write about? The blank page is haunting me as if to say- write, write, write……… fuck! just to put something on paper let’s talk about sex 😉
It’s 230pm and I haven’t done shit today however I am considering seducing my husband but I haven’t shaved ( not that he would care), nor have I have any ambition. It takes ALOT of energy for women to have sex. and for my situation, it is no different. As ya’ll know my spouse is transitioning FTM (female to male).
There is NOTHING simple about lesbian sex let alone sex with your transpartner. it takes a real commitment, a good sense of humor, confidence, and ALOT energy. Just bear with me as I explain…
When a male and a female have sex it is easier and it is over faster. Before spouse transitioned we were two happy lesbians having lesbian sex. YES the whole kit n kaboodle of lesbian sex- 69, sissoring, fingering, dildo’s, strap ons, licking, laping, sucking, you name it- we did it. And yes, you can do all of that with hetrosex- BUT on this side of the fence it takes a bit more finess.
For starters, the flow of the sexual act is not as smooth. Alot of planing goes into homosex/transsex. Last night I decided to initiate. I start nibbling on to my partner’s neck which is giving the clear signal for – hey I am ready!! As we are getting into it we must stop to get things in place. For a trans- they must be “packing” the right equipment for the occassion. If they are not then they have to stop in the middle of the make out session to get the proper “attire” for the occassion. This would be alot more easier if I could be blunt………………… let’s be blunt …. so in order for my transpartner to fuck me, the right dick needs to be in place. Since my partner is FTM (female to male ) then there is an assortment of dicks to choose from for any occasion. who knew?? that is a topic for another post. LOL
Since my partner was not wearing the proper penis then it required him to stop in the middle of foreplay to put it on. Spontaneity does happen and can happen but a different approach is needed. on this occasion, my partner was only wearing his pee packer ( used for everyday use for wearing, going to the bathroom and just giving my partner a realistic experience to being what he desires to be- a man.) The pee packer is about 5 inches long, bendy, and not at all equipped to be used for sex so it is time for a dick change. Literally.
My partner goes to the bathroom to remedy the situation. Now I have two choices- either I can be annoyed and be totally turned off OR I can take the opportunity to get the mood right. Jumping up I run to the bedroom lighting some candles, shoo the dog out the door (nothing like breaking the mood with a wet dog nose in your face in the heat of passion), push the clean laundry onto the floor ( who cares about that now!) and hit playlist for some mood music.
Once the stage has been set, it is now time to get down and dirty and have some fun.
Why am I telling you this? It is simple- YOUR viewpoint can make or break your day. It is easy for me to get annoyed or put off having to go through a “dick” change everytime I want sex with my partner. To be honest, there are days when I am simply tired and just cannot conjure the energy to go that extra mile. Instead of getting annoyed I just factor in this is part of my life now. No biggie. However it is in those moments when things don’t go as smoothly as you like, or things get sidetracked is when I have the BEST bonding experiences with my partner.
Life is full of inconveniences but when it comes to loving yourself, your children, and your partner- there is NOTHING inconvenient about that. 🙂